Are These Europe's Weirdest Toilets?

“There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom.”
-Kiefer Sutherland

Národní divadlo

TopGear Bar

On my first visit to this Hybernská club I was confused, when entering the gents, as to where a man should go if he does not need the cubicle – until I noticed a large-screen TV playing music videos and, at its base, a trough. Now logic would tell me that a trough would normally run along the bottom of a urinal, while every sensible bone in my body told me that I should not pee on a TV screen run by electricity. On enquiring with the barman he proceeded to tell me in front of other patrons at the bar that he would regularly come in during the morning, put on ČT1 or ČT2, and pee on the screen at whichever politician was on the TV at that time. When I went back later to take this photo, I still couldn’t bring myself to use the large TV screen, it just didn’t seem right. www.topgearbar.cz

Lokál Bar

Growing up I had a scrapbook and whenever I would find a cool magazine clipping with my favorite car or some singer or band I liked, I would cut it out and stick it in the book with a flour-and-water home-made glue mix. The walls in the gent’s toilets in Lokál on Dlouhá do seem to be a big kid’s scrapbook. The cutouts from vintage porn mags are a bit more grown-up than the cutouts I had, but essentially it seems like the same thing. The combination of the cool cars and scantily clad women on display seems very out of character for this fairly conservative Dlouhá beer hall, but I’m definitely not complaining.
http://lokal-dlouha.ambi.cz/en/

Phenomen

There seems to be a trend among Prague bars and pubs in which they generally try to confuse their alcohol-impaired patrons into thinking that there is free punch provided in the toilets. At least I think that’s the idea. At this club/comedy venue just along from Anděl, it seems that Carmen Miranda tripped and fell head first into the urinal trough. I realize they are trying to keep things fresh but surely this is a lemon slice too far? www.phenomen.cz

První Pivní Tramway

There is a hand-drawn “gallery” of sorts drawn on the tiles, of women’s topiary (pubic hair) labelled with names. Whether these are based on real life or come from someone’s very active imagination and niche artistic skill I don’t know, but there they were. I will definitely return to this bar. Though no more lower region doodles were spotted elsewhere, it is all based on the inside of a tram with an extensive list of beers to be tested.www.prvnipivnitramway.cz

Palladium Shopping Centre

You know how it is when you’re out shopping with the wife or girlfriend, you have probably said the wrong thing, upset her and then you have to make her wait as you’re caught short and need to use the bathroom. Standard. So what better way when you’re there then to be judged by posters of women scrutinizing and smirking at you whilst you are trying to relieve yourself alongside other shop-wearied gents. I’m pretty sure they don’t have similar pictures of laughing men on the backs of the women’s cubicles – or maybe they do. If so let me know. www.palladiumpraha.cz

James Dean

Just on the corner of Dlouhá sits this American diner/dance club. I’m afraid that it’s only the men reading this who will be able to witness the full tastelessness of what’s in store for them when they need to use the toilet here. Whether it’s supposed to be the iconic Rolling Stones’ lips or Marilyn Monroe’s, four pairs of giant red plastic lips await bathroom users at this location. www.jamesdean.cz

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What is your craziest encounter of the WC kind to date?